Updated: Sep 4
"You don't attract who you want, you attract who you are!"
So, who are you?
Are you a needy person in love who believes that if you find your soulmate, you will then be the happiest person and feel complete?
Let me burst your bubble, if this is a requisite, what you are looking for, is a twin flame connection, not your soulmate.
Soulmates are two 'complete' (whole) people who come together to complement each other's presence, in each other's lives, for a divine purpose and to help each other evolve in the process, towards being the highest versions of themselves.
There are a few ways you can find your soulmate.
Tip #1 - Radiating Love
If you are frustrated with swiping left and right on dating apps, and constantly find yourself meeting people that are either taken, emotionally unavailable, or just interested in a fling, maybe you have been giving out the vibration of being needy, desperate, and clingy.
You don't have to say it, your vibrations pick up the frequency of your emotions. You cant hide them no matter how good an actor you are.
Your body language, eye movements, twitch of a face muscle, tone of voice, choice of words, flip of your head, will reveal you.
How do you switch this? It's simple. By working on your need for love by giving that love and time to yourself so you're not needy. Now you might ask, "How does loving yourself, make up for having a partner?" It doesn't, it simply shifts your vibration to where your attention switched. Love yourself means express self-care, 'treating' yourself, do things for yourself that you would expect a partner to do for you, without feeling like a fool. Spend time writing a journal about all the lovely qualities you love about yourself, and the good deeds you do. We rarely acknowledge ourselves, and always make that an external expectation. When you start loving yourself for everything you are, your assets, and your shortcomings, it reflects in your VIBE! This creates an impact on how you carry yourself.
"There's a very visible invisible radiance of good energy which makes you a strong magnet for love from someone who is equally as positive and radiant as yourself."
~ Aarti Chabria Beedassy
Tip #2 - Feeling Relaxed And Confident
Simply saying 'lose the anxiety around finding love' makes it even more difficult, so how does one switch from 'feeling anxious' and 'in a hurry' to feeling 'relaxed and confident'? The best way would be by scheduling focused time around doing things you love with close ones, whether it's playing a board game, going for lunch, working on a pet project, spending time in the salon towards self-care, or taking up meditation or yoga sessions, the moment you shift your focus on doing things you love, you start radiating an inner calm, a glow of happiness. This feeling makes you accept that you don't need someone, in your life 'to make' you happy, you are happy irrespective. And only because you are happy, will you ever be able to attract a similar type of person who is also complete and happy by themselves.
"You can be happy and alone, but lonely people are rarely happy." ~ Aarti Chabria Beedassy
Tip #3 - Acknowledging Love
What you focus on, grows in your life, and what you forget about, diminishes. It's a part of the Law Of Attraction. So as long as you are focussing on complaining about not finding love, or saying things like, "Where are all the good singles? they're either married, taken, or uninterested.", that's exactly what will grow in your life. You will start seeing more examples of what you believe in, and you will reiterate how your belief is true. Whereas the truth is: "You choose your beliefs and then your beliefs make you."
If you chose to focus on the lack of good singles around you, you cannot expect good singles to show up. If you're focussing on lack. Lack will show up! Period.
On the other hand, saying I want to find a fantastic partner, or I want to get married, is also an indication of 'lack'. Why? Because you can only 'want', what you do not have. Thus by saying 'you want', you create more situations where you will 'keep wanting', and not create situations of 'having' instead.
So then what can get you to shift from the 'lack frequency' in love to the 'frequency of abundance' in love?
It's simple. Start acknowledging the presence of abundant love in your life. It doesn't have to be any particular kind of love, it just needs to be 'love'. You notice and recognise that your parents / siblings / friends / colleagues / team / neighbours / employees / or even pet loves you. Realize your worthiness of love and do more to attract their love and appreciation in your life. Make an effort towards it. By doing this your focus shifts on having love, and being loved, so what do you think it will attract in your life? More chances of LOVE.
Very often our ungratefulness for the time, energy, and emotion that people invest in us to express their love, goes unacknowledged and taken for granted. This makes love diminish and makes our chances of attracting pure love, clean and undiluted, unconditional love- distant. Thus, acknowledging love in our life is like magnifying that love in our lives.
Acknowledge love by writing gratitude affirmations for all the love you are currently receiving. Let the people know you are grateful for their love, whether it's in the form of their time, attention, or emotions.
"What we magnify with our focus, we magnetize in our lives."
"You choose your beliefs and then your beliefs make you."
~ Aarti Chabria Beedassy
Tip #4 - Cutting Off From The Past And 'Exes' Especially, Completely
Ideally, I would have liked to make this my first point, as 'forgiveness and cleansing' are primary for anyone to find fresh new love, but I put it here because it's probably the toughest, for a lot of people. You would need to cut ties with anyone from the past that you have been pursuing that has not reached any outcome, seems a bit stale, or is an EX. This person needs to be 'let go of 100%', to create space for someone new of a 'different kind' (different frequency) that you have not been with before, like you would ideally want, for a healthy soulful relationship.
This ideal soulmate isn't someone you need to play games with, this is someone who gets you! Someone ideal for you.
To cut off from past chords means cutting off not just from exes but anyone potential who you have doubted being a waste of your precious time or has made you second guess where you stand in their lives. Soulmates don't do this. This is what I call toxic. Why? because it never works out, and even if it does at some point, it lands up in the same negative pattern eventually. Soulmate relationships are more steady, and smooth. It's not like soulmates don't fight or don't argue, the point is that you don't feel like a boomerang in a soulmate relationship.
If you cut your past chords temporarily with the thought, that you have cut them out but they are on 'stand by' - this does not work in clearing the energy 'they have created in your life. Cutting off means permanently giving up on hearing from them, feeling the need to speak to them as a friend, or even the need of knowing, how they're doing. Any of these could take you down a rabbit hole. When you eventually win this tug of war of emotions and attachment/addiction and can let go, that is when you're 100 steps closer to your ideal life partner. Yes! In this one step, you are 100 steps closer.
This tip helps you get rid of blocks created subconsciously.
And what happens if you have never been in a relationship at all?
You don't have an 'ex' or their memories to deal with? Lucky you.
But other questions come up: Are you dealing with a childhood belief that got imprinted while you were growing up around your parents, or some belief you picked up along the way? This would need a separate kind of 'work', but work it needs for sure. You cannot escape having to 'cut the chords with the past', to attract an ideal relationship. Identifying what needs clearing, is the job of a professional - if you haven't been in a relationship so far and are struggling for years to find your soulmate.
Tip #5 - Knowing What You Want To Feel And Feeling It NOW.
Being clear about who you want is one thing, but being able to feel the emotions of what each quality in your ideal soulmate will make you feel, is a whole new high. Why?
"Emotions are the carriers of our desires" ~ Aarti Chabria Beedassy
The moment you can feel the emotion of how it would be, to be with this person, look into their eyes, watch their lips twitch as they smile, see their hair fly over their face, hear the sound of their giggle mix with the waves, feel the warmth of their hand in your yours, surrender to the happiness of feeling whole and being loved for everything that you are, is the key to manifesting /attracting this ideal soulmate in your life.
How to feel all this without them being in your life? Self-work is necessary. Guided visualizations, meditations, affirmation writings, hypnosis, and many more simple methods, help the process, but only 5% of people have it in them, to go past this step, 95% of people fail either because they are lazy, don't desire a soulmate really that seriously (anyone will do), or do not believe in the magic of this self-work.
A Step By Step Proven Formula Towards Finding Your Soulmate?
There are self-work tools and techniques, methods created on age-old proven formulae, to get you ready for a soulful, healthy relationship by Victorious Mind Power.
The Programme is called The Perfect Soulmate Programme, and it is 'now live' with hundreds of successful students that have completed the programme and attracted their ideal life partner after the self-work prescribed.
You can Buy Access to The Perfect Soulmate Programme here :